Mayfair Vol 29 Issue 2 - February 1994
Filth in full glossy colour, in an ever changing world Mayfair is the one thing you can fall back on when you need a relief from the torment of everyday life. Well that is of course if your everyday life is not talking about Mayfair magazine!
Fuck me! Its sounds like I’m complaining. Right come on lad; snap out of it. Tell them about Claire Steers. Well as you can see from the cover Claire is blonde, fit as a butchers dog and doesn’t shave her legs. Can you see how the flash from the camera has picked up on those wispy blonde hairs on the top of her thighs and bottom? She’s inside; yippee.
And so is Charmaine Sinclair who’s got an absolute peach of a bottom and the best shaped tits you’re likely to see.
Next up is not one of my favourite Page 3 girls but she may be yours; its Cindy Milo. I wouldn’t chuck Cindy out of bed but I’d definitely be diving in in Mayfair’s next Page 3 offering shouted me upstairs.
Its Louise Payne and I am. Bloody hell this girls not only fit but her face is wanktastic, she’s shot here by Ralph in the sexiest underwear you could buy. Where the fuck do you buy this gear because the Army and Navy have nowt like this, although to be honest the gas mask improves the wife’s shagability no end.
I’m going to finish on Kirsty Keating (again). Every time I see her in a magazine shoot she always plays hard to get but she comes round to my way of thinking eventually - or is that just me thinking?
Mayfair Vol 29 Issue 3 - March 1994
Get In! Now you can tell how many times I read Mayfair magazine because on a solitary page floating amongst a sea full of fanny flotsam the first thing I hit the bricks with is page 18 and a guy called Roger Gillham has published his latest version of Scalextric, Cars and Equipment of Past and Present. Bear in mind this mag was published in 1994 so further later editions maybe available, and a quick check on Amazon reveals that they’ve got various editions for sale from £4.66 to £93.88 so no doubt a car comes with that one.
On page 52 is an article Friday Night Is Fetish Night which reminds me of the time when Dave the owner of Shiny Magazine came up to Manchester as he was doing a photoshoot for a Rubber Fetish Ball taking place at a club in Manchester called Sankey Soap.
So he pops by the shop early doors and drops off some leather chaps for me with no arse cheeks in them and laces up the side of each leg. After a stewards enquiry he assures me that everybody will be dressed in fetish gear and he will too.
So I turn up at the club and walk to the front of the queue with my arse hanging out (please picture this; I AM normal) and the bouncer lets me in where I find Shiny Dave in his fetish gear; which is a leather waistcoat!
Footnote: The girls of note are: Louise Sherwood, Tracey Harper and Laura Anthony.
Mayfair Vol 29 Issue 4 - April 1994
There’s obviously something in Scotland’s water other than just “Famous Grouse” because considering the size of its population as I go through all the mag titles I’m beginning to notice how many girls come from Bonny Scotland - actually I suppose the clue is in the name.
Kirsten Imrie, Shona McTavish, Stacy Owen, Pauline Hickey and now it turns out on page 5 of this months issue, which is April 94, so does Sharon Mackintosh.
I like Shaz because she looks like the sort of girl I’d have half a chance of chatting up and she’s got them sort of ‘rabbit teeth’ . The blurb tells us that she last appeared in Volume 28 No 12 and she’s 19. Sounds perfect.
Another girl I like is Hayley Marie. I’d probably like her a lot better if everybody would just spell her name the same way as it would make my job a lot easier. Anyway, Hayley is like one of those Hollywood movie stars who you see all the time but don’t know their name. Have a look, you’ll like her.
Finally the last set is shot by Mr Medland and the girl is called Maria. I don’t recall seeing her before she’s got an Indian complexion and she’s a stonker. The only problem is that she’s lacking a little meat in the thigh area so her white lace panties don’t stretch tightly across her pussy. Hey Ho!
Mayfair Vol 29 Issue 5 - May 1994
I’ll stick my neck out here. See the cover girl; its Jenna Jameson. Now I know she’s a porn star and she’s a world famous porn star but for the life of me I can’t see what all the fuss is about. Okay so she’s blonde, but to me Jenna needs a decent meal because she’s as thin as a rake and her body has no structure to it.
Now. To prove the point turn to page 54 and look at Carrie Lorimer. Carrie’s got tits you’d call big, she’s got a pair of meaty thighs and I’m telling you that when the bedroom door slams shut, Carrie will be a miles better shag than Jenna.
In each issue of Mayfair there’s a gazillion birds and I can’t mention them all but I’ll finish with Lana Cox. Now write in and tell me what’s wrong with her. Answers on a postage stamp please!
Mayfair Vol 29 Issue 7 - July 1994
In the interests of fucking your life and your porn budget up, I’ll begin by telling you that Michelle Tooley is inside this month and also appeared in Mayfair Vol 29 No 5 but I didn’t mention her. Then to make your life worse, I’ll now tell you that if you search for her under her porn name which is Misha Lee you’ll probably end up finding pix of Mischa Lee who was an Australian big tit porn star who featured regularly in Score magazine.
To assist you in complaining as to why everybody calls your favourite glamour model a different name you can call us and be routed to our automatic answering service. To buy a magazine you press 1. To sell a magazine you press 2 and to be put on hold until you give up and die just press 3. To be honest just buy the magazine to figure out the problem because she’s fit, she looks like she’ll do anything and then you won’t care anyway.
I sit at home at night with ‘her indoors’ and every time (which is EVERY NIGHT) up pops the latest film channel with the film, Love Actually. The reason I mention this is because right at the end of the movie the girl who I was suppose to marry turns up and that Claudia Schiffer. Claudia is inside this month - but only in a bikini.
Last but not least I can’t read a mag without stopping to tell you that Kirsty Keating is inside and wait till you see her full belly and full bottom cream coloured panties.
Mayfair Vol 29 Issue 8 - August 1994
August 1994 and judging by the front cover Mayfair is in the pink. I know I certainly am because those of you who read these scriptures will know that I’m already drooling over Maria Sheriff who’s on the cover with Lana Cox. All I’m hoping now is that she’s inside this month and Mr Bleach the editor is not going to make me wait for the next issue.
OH NO! I mean yes, christ she’s inside and on the first picture on page 37 Maria is looking right at the camera wearing some powder blue sleeping lingerie pushing her boobs against her chest with her forearms. I don’t like skinny birds but I don’t know what it is but Miss Sheriff hits all the buttons.
Sharlene Woodsford is the centrefold so that would have been another good reason to part with £2.25 back in 94. Sharlene is another model who sells magazines and its hardly surprising that you find her so popular because she looks sultry and that beauty spot is an absolute cracker.
If you ever come across (easy tiger) a copy of this mag have a look at page 62 where the girl called Gail Tiptree strips. Now she’s a right darling and although the bra that she’s wearing does little to enhance her looks, get a load of her panties.
Mayfair Vol 29 Issue 9 - September 1994
The cover girl this month is Mandy Bradley but I’ll come back to her in a moment. First off I need to report that Nicole Simmonds and Shanine Linton appear in a two girl set and you won’t believe how sexy the lingerie is that Nicole is wearing. Its like a black see through body with lace on the bra cups but the cups are structured so that they present her boobs like two perfectly shaped orbs.
Oakie coakie back to our cover girl Mandy who’s another model hailing from Bonny Scotland and Mr Mayfair is so impressed with how she looks in a white high cut body with lace trim and white hold ups that he has given her the centre pages as well.
For those of you that read Score magazine then you’ll be please to see Sarah Lee who appears this month in the ’Girl Next Door’ section. Sarah’s got 40 odd inches of naturally hanging pleasure up top and a neatly trimmed bush below.
Back in the June issue of Mayfair from this year Sharon Mackintosh took the cover shot and here she is again on page 62 shot by Mrs Allum. Shaz is wearing black seamed stockings in black heels with black suspenders. Form an orderly queue!
Mayfair Vol 29 Issue 11 - November 1994
Back on the cover of the April edition of Men Only from 1993 you will see Shanine Linton with a pair of suede purple riding chaps adorning her body. The reason I tell you this is that inside this month the first girl out of the hat is Caroline Borrett and Joanie ‘the tog’ Allum has used them again to frame Carolines pussy.
Blimey its Diana Van Laar! Photographed by Viv Thomas, Diana last appeared in Mayfair a little short of 12 months ago when she took the cover shot dressed in black. Today she’s dressed completely in a virginal white lace and fishnet body.
Pornstar Anita Blonde makes her debut appearance in Mayfair and Nella Meredith and Sammy Walker star in a 2 girl les set dressed in victorian underclothes. Heathcliff bring the strirrups!
Mayfair Vol 29 Issue 12 - December 1994
The cover this month screams ‘Two Girls One Bed!’ and one fat bastard… I added the last bit myself, the fat bastard being me of course. Its Eve Vorley and Sharon Mackintosh. A likkle bit of triv for you. Eve Vorley is the partner of porn baron David Sullivan the one time publisher of Whitehouse, Playbirds etc.
Right at the back and fresh from her debut appearance last month, Anita Blonde makes a welcome return with only a skimpy pair of black panties hiding her modesty which you’ll be pleased to know come off.
Next up another girl with two names, its Melanie Reeves. Her real name on the Joanie Allum website is Melanie Woods but the majority of collectors know her as Reeves so that’s the name this site is now using and we’re changing the old data as and when we find it.
If you’ve never visited Joanie’s site then you’ll be well advised to take a look as its a trip down memory lane. She's at www.joanieallum.co.uk
Mayfair Vol 29 Issue 13 - Special 1994
With one hand we wave goodbye to 1994 and with the other I flick one out Diane Foss. Diane makes her debut appearance in Mayfair photographed by John Graham, which is a change for John because he generally does the big titted girls. I’m not complaining mind, as he’s captured Di great in a little white get up with lacy briefs.
Here you are; look. Hayley Marie’s back and this time they’ve spelt it Haley. Jesus, give us a chance will you. We last saw Hayley in April of this year and this time the curly haired beauty tells us that she’s looking for a new boyfriend. I wonder if she’s found one yet, I mean as I write this she’ll have been looking for 23 years.